What to expect when you're expecting

The new film, "What to expect when you're expecting" is out in cinemas this week (25 May).  I'm not donning my 'film reviewer' hat, don't worry.  But, watching this film's trailer did get me thinking about the little things you may or may not realise about pregnancy once you get up the duff.

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So without further ado, here are five things you should expect when you find out you're expecting...

1. The 'pregnancy glow' isn't guaranteed.
You may have read or heard about the mythical 'glow' of pregnancy.  You might picture yourself becoming pregnant and suddenly transforming into an even more glamorous version of yourself - someone who wouldn't look out of place in the gossip pages of the celebrity magazines - with a tidy and well dressed baby bump.

Don't be fooled.

First there's the morning sickness.  If that doesn't floor you, your raging hormones will.  Think mood swings, spots, extreme sweating and leaking boobs.  Then there's baby using your ribs and insides as a punchbag...and suddenly it's not so glamorous any more.  Of course, for some women that pregnancy glow is real, very real.   But it's not guaranteed.  You have been warned!

2. Your breasts will get mahoosive!

This is a definite plus point.  At some point along the line, your boobs will blossom!  I was delighted to find my chest had grown by a couple of cup sizes.  The best thing about it for me is that my bosom is still bigger now than it was in my pre-baby days - bonus!

3. Your baby's first movements will not necessarily feel like 'butterflies against your stomach'.

It's not necessarily as romantic sounding as the baby books suggest.  When I was pregnant with my first, I had read all about how those precious first movements feel like butterflies under your skin.  For me, it felt more like a log turning over in the pit of my stomach. With Dexter, it was more gentle, like bubbles bursting against my skin (but from the inside obviously).

4. Expect less honesty.

This one comes from my husband.  We all know deep down that when we ask our men 'does my bum look big in this?' the automatic reply from them is 'no, of course not' even if it's far from the truth.  However, in pregnancy, these little white lies grow as big as your ever-expanding waistline.

Asking 'do I look sexy?', 'does this coat disguise my puke stained top?' etc. can be a recipe for disaster, namely because your partner will tell you what you want to hear, not the real truth.  In all honesty, if you asked them if blue was red, they'd probably agree just to keep you happy.

You'll probably know what they're telling you is a lie and the fact they're being so blatantly dishonest may lead to a full blown argument (especially if the pregnancy hormones decide to get involved!).  It's better for everyone if you don't ask in the first place, or accept these dishonesties and move on.

And the biggest one of all *drum roll*...

5. Don't expect anyone to give up their seat for you on public transport...especially if you live or work in London.

"What do you mean I have to give up my seat for you?  You didn't to get pregnant, it was your choice.  I mean, you're not ill, you chose to get pregnant ergo I don't have to give you anything.  I've paid for my ticket just like you so I'm entitled to sit down..."

This is the general attitude you'll come across so don't expect strangers to graciously give up their seats for you.  They'll spot you getting on the tube / train / bus and instantly lift their book / newspaper / kindle / mobile / iPad so it obscures their view and they don't have to acknowledge you.  They hope that someone else will relinquish their seat before they have to.  If they give up their seat, it's very likely they'll do it reluctantly.  

They may say that it's hard to tell if a woman is pregnant and that can be true, especially if you're in the early stages of pregnancy or your bump is obscured by a winter coat.  However, I've seen very heavily pregnant women purposefully blanked.  It's a sad fact, but true. If you want a seat you'll need to ask.

What have I missed out?  What else should people expect when they're expecting?